Reader Question:
I found a guy online exactly who lives 500 miles away. He is 34 and that I’m 53. The guy did let me know he had a lady he dated «locally» and that he had been just on the internet site selecting friends. 90 days later on we discovered we’ve thoughts per other.
At the same time, he how to hookup with transever shows he’s experiencing difficulity together with his girlfriend, who is not somebody he’s «dating» locally. He is living with the lady and they’ve been with each other for four years.
I finally made the decision we’d to fulfill to see if it was worth seeking. The guy gave me why he didn’t consider it had been right to get it done while he was still along with her. I finally gave him an ultimatum and told him i possibly couldn’t play 2nd fiddle. The guy professed his love but said he had been extremely baffled.
Perform we offer him ultimatum, it really is her or myself? In the morning we wrong to inquire about him in order to make that decision?
-Nancy (Fl)
Dr Wendy Walsh’s Response:
Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You wrote for me for honesty, correct? Really, will you be relaxing? Because here comes a honey cooking pot of real life.
You’re staying in dream area, my personal precious lady. You have not actually came across this individual just who may or may not be men and who may or may not have a girlfriend.
I highly recommend the truth is the documentary «Catfish» (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an internet love fraud.
But even though you you shouldn’t do this, let`s say for a while he’s in fact whom he says he could be and overlook the reality he began writing to you personally by lying about their relationship status.
Let’s just check out the so-called insights.
A.) He is nearly two decades younger than you.
B.) He’s in a significant relationship.
C.) The guy said right away he’s just seeking to be buddies.
Thus I ask you, why can you exposure your heart on this type of a negative wager?
Issue should not be about providing him an ultimatum, but alternatively, should you give yourself the really love you deserve?
In that case, then this is simply not the pony you need to drive inside sundown with. Manage, girl!
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